Jun

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June 19, 2003 |

Today IDF troops are forcibly removing Jewish residents of Mitzpeh Yitzhar. The residents of the “settlement” are putting up a fight. Apparently they have been setting fire to nearby Arab-owned fields and blocking the roads as well as directly engaging the troops that have been sent to demolish their homes. Their homes are tents of course and not all that difficult to destroy.

So what does it mean? Do we who live here feel proud of the soldiers who are attempting to carry out their missions without harming the Jews who are trying to stop them? Or do we feel sad that the State of Israel feels the need to betray the people who daily risk their lives trying to secure the Land of Israel for the Jewish people? Do we get angry at the residents of these tiny “outposts” for making things hard for the soldiers who are merely trying to follow their orders with minimal damage? Or do we cheer for Jews who are tired of lying down and letting the tide of history wash away their homes and their futures?

The answer, like everything else here, is not simple.

Both the residents of the “disputed territories” and the soldiers sent to displace them are Jews in the Land of Israel who have no real idea whether what they are doing is morally right or wrong. Nobody knows. Not the politicians who are making the decisions to oust them nor the protestors who are clamoring for Sharon’s head on a platter. We don’t know.

The sad thing is that we really want to know. If ever there is a decided difference between those of us on this side of the conflict and those on the other, it is that the Jews of Israel really want to do the right thing. We don’t only want to do what Gd wants us to do, we are desparate to know if what we think Gd wants is morally correct. Orthodox Jews don’t like to ask that question, it seems, because they are afraid of the answer. Maybe what we think Gd wants is not morally right. “Our morals are not Gd’s morals.” The Christians are lucky. As it is done on Earth so shall it be in Heaven. But Jews don’t have that luxury. We are forever asking ourselves, “Do we have it right? Is this what You really want from us?”

My child is coming into the world soon, Gd willing, and I don’t know if raising her in a land of terrorists and beauracrats (sometimes I’m not sure which is worse) is selfish and dangerous or idealistic and noble. And I won’t know. Probably not in my lifetime. But what I know is that as long as I keep asking the questions and trying to find answers, as long as I don’t just do things because “Gd says so,” as long as I consider the consequences of my choices, then if I am not fulfilling Gd’s wishes, at least I can approach Him with a clear conscience when the time comes and say, “I did my best.”

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